The Childhood We're Trying to Give Our Children
How our own childhood experiences shape the memories, expectations, and traditions we create for our kids.
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Reflections on birth, postpartum, and the emotional experience of motherhood. New posts every other week.
The Grief That Doesn't Fit: Pregnancy Loss and the Life You Imagined
Pregnancy loss is not only about the pregnancy itself. For many women, it is also the loss of a relationship, an imagined future, and a life that had already begun to take shape. This article explores the complicated grief that can follow miscarriage and pregnancy loss, including anger, guilt, fear, and the anxiety that sometimes resurfaces during a subsequent pregnancy or after childbirth.
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ADHD in Motherhood: Why Everything Suddenly Feels Harder
Many women reach motherhood having spent years appearing organized, capable, and high-achieving, only to suddenly feel scattered, forgetful, overstimulated, or unable to keep up. This post explores how motherhood can expose executive-functioning vulnerabilities that were easier to compensate for before children, why trying harder often does not solve the problem, and how understanding the systems that once held us together can help us stop confusing difficulty with failure.
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The Life You Thought You Would Have
Somewhere between work, childcare, relationships, school decisions, and the endless responsibilities of motherhood, many women stop asking whether the life they are building still feels like one they consciously chose. This post explores the tension between gratitude and longing, the stories we inherit about what a good life should look like, and why becoming curious about what we want now does not require blowing up the life we already have. Sometimes it simply means choosing again.
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The Birth You Are Still Carrying
Birth trauma does not always end when the birth is over. Sometimes the helplessness we felt in those moments follows us quietly into motherhood, showing up as hypervigilance, over-preparing, difficulty trusting others, or an intense need to stay one step ahead. This post explores how the birth we are still carrying can shape the way we parent, and how healing begins when we learn to separate present-day uncertainty from the danger our nervous system still remembers.
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When Your Child's Struggles Become Your Own
As a new school year begins, many parents find themselves carrying more than backpacks and lunchboxes. We carry worries about friendships, confidence, separation, and whether our children will be okay once they walk through those classroom doors. This post explores why our children's struggles can feel like our own, the difference between carrying and accompanying, and how raising resilient children often begins by learning to stand beside their emotions instead of trying to take them away.
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The Child You Imagined and the Child in Front of You
Long before our children are born, we begin imagining who they might become. We picture their personalities, their interests, the relationship we'll share, and the future we'll build together. But children have a remarkable way of introducing themselves instead. This post explores the quiet grief of letting go of the child we imagined, the privilege of discovering the child who is actually here, and why motherhood often asks us to trade certainty for curiosity.
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The Mother You Thought You Would Be
Before we become mothers, many of us quietly imagine who motherhood will allow us to become. We picture ourselves calmer, more patient, more certain, and somehow transformed by the experience of bringing a child into the world. But what happens when birth, postpartum, or motherhood itself reveals someone we never expected to meet? This post explores the quiet grief of letting go of the mother we imagined, and the compassion we can begin to offer the mother who is actually here.
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Why Summer Can Make You Feel Like a Worse Mother
The question “What are your summer plans?” can sound simple, but for many mothers it opens up a private calculation of childcare, work, money, camp sign-ups, and whether they are doing enough. This article looks at why summer can feel so loaded, especially after birth trauma, postpartum anxiety, ADHD, or the exhaustion of early motherhood.
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Why Everything Feels So Loud After Kids
Sometimes motherhood feels hard not because of one dramatic moment, but because everything feels like too much all at once. The noise, the touching, the questions, the whining, the mental tabs, and the constant emotional availability can leave mothers feeling overstimulated before the day has even begun. This article explores why motherhood can feel so loud, especially for mothers with ADHD, anxiety, trauma histories, or high sensitivity, and why needing quiet, space, and recovery is not a failure of mothering.
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5 Signs You Might Be Experiencing Birth Trauma
Birth doesn’t happen in a single moment, it unfolds across time, shaping our memories, emotions, and hopes for the future. For some mothers, birth can leave lasting emotional impacts that ripple through the past, present, and future. You might notice overwhelming memories, intense physical or emotional reactions, struggles with bonding, changes in how you see yourself, or worries about the future. These experiences are valid, and healing is possible. At Birth Feelings, we support mothers in processing birth trauma, reclaiming their story, and finding empowerment in their motherhood journey.
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Reflections on birth, postpartum, ADHD, and the emotional experience of motherhood, delivered every other week.